Resits are just around the corner and I’m struggling to stay awake studying every night. I don’t have a choice… if I sleep too much at night I won’t have enough time to cover all the topics and get started on the past year questions before the exam.

CURSE YOU AS BIOLOGY MODULE 2!

The worst part is that there are still modules 4 and 5 I will need to memorize by the end of the academic year when I do my A Level exams. Oh, the stress.

I begin to wonder if it is really just the way I was raised that shaped me into such a worry-wart. It’s not like I did tremendously bad. I got a B for my first try at the AS exams. Yet it doesn’t satisfy me.

Not to mention I had to balance my academics with a Sepilok project which included three trips to Sabah, a mad orchestra timetable (we do weeks of consecutive-day rehearsals before every performance) and Grade 8 violin exam prep classes.

Yet if I get anything less of an A grade in any exam, I feel less of a person of value….

OK that’s exaggerated.

I just feel sad and think I should work harder but I’m already fucking exhausted everyday and Idk if it’s my own problem or whatever blah I’m going to bed I give up.